All over the place

A rainy evening of April; I have to admit that I am in a difficult situation with my writings. I have plenty of ideas to talk about and a ton of work to work through, but, I am doing nothing. Some days it just feels like dragging a block of granite up a hill, slowly, heavily. I started my website with an idea of sharing my knowledge in environmental studies and about my life (hopefully) as an inspiration to others. I started with enthusiasm, invested time and money in developing a website, told myself just to take 1% at a time, I did, but then I hung up. Years passed by…

Knowing that I should not rely on motivation but discipline, but it is easier said than done. When life gets challenged and uncertainty hits hardly on the door. The just-graduated-me has been thrown into chaos, merely, the job market is looking like a gambling room at this moment. I have tried, my friends have tried, we all go up and down. We seem to be struggling at the bottom of the Maslow hierarchy, and yet to be at the point where we are able to express ourselves. I haven’t seen any new posts or essays from my friends, whose writings amaze me every time they publish. We were keen to talk but now we just keep it silent or express through snapshots on social media.

Are we influenced by the fast-content era, or are we just giving up on talking because it’s all over the place?

On average of around three months, I receive a notice from a friend saying their job got disrupted and they are on the way to move to another state, looking for another something. I know it is frustrating as I have been doing the same. We gave up on complaining and just accept that life is on-going, so we move. Thoughts are all over my head, I wish I could just clean it up and organize my mind like I do my room. I hope we all get things sorted out soon.